When I came online a few years ago and found other adult fans, I was so thrilled! Yay, other people around my age and older who like the guys. This was so cool! Well, not anymore. Lately being an adult fan seems to have taken on a whole new meaning. It means that you think you have the right to judge and criticize BSB all you want. Throw in plenty of cynicism and a know-it-all attitude and there you have 75% of adult fans.

I don't like using the term mature when I refer to adult fans because I've always said that maturity is an attitude not an age! I'm now seeing how right I was. This is how I now view adult fans: the true fans like myself who love BSB no matter what, support BSB and don't berate everything the Boys do that doesn't fit their terms or standards. And no, we're not naïve; we're just FANS! Then there are the fans that think the guys are perfect and pretend like nothing bad ever happens in BSB-land. They're the naïve ones. Then we have the cynical know-it-alls who think that the Boys owe them something. The ones that will get mad or make a sarcastic comment about everything BSB does, good or otherwise. Of course there are also the users, but they can fit into any of the above categories.

The comments and rumors that I've been reading and hearing lately are just pissing me off - more than any bad BSB news could at this point. There are those Kevin fans who call themselves fans, but who) find great pleasure in insulting him every second of every day. If it's not about his charity, then it's his marriage or his wife. Oh yes, cause Kevin's a liar, his marriage is a joke and he's a sexiest pig. And how do YOU know this? YOU DON'T! Unless you're friends with Kevin or any BSB, you don't know anything! So why run your yap (or fingers in this case) about it over and over? Some fans have even stated that they can't stand Kevin anymore. What has he ever done to YOU? Do you think that he owes you anything other than albums and concerts? HE DOESN'T! His job is MUSIC! If his marriage turns out to be a joke, you can all gloat and say "See, I knew it!" But do it privately - we don't need to hear it. I, on the other hand, will just hope he's happy and leave it at that.

We'd all love to sit down in a room with them and ask them questions that WE want answers to. I would, too! But I know that's never going to happen. I try to remember that I am just a fan and I don't have any right to insist on knowing what's going on in their personal lives, as much as I'd like to. I don't spend sleepless nights wondering why Kevin married Kristin or if Leighanne has Brian pussywhipped or if Sarah is using AJ for her own career. It's none of my business. It doesn't affect my life. When Nick got arrested, I was concerned, but that was it. It all blew over in a matter of a week. I didn't lose any sleep over it.

No matter how much the fans bitch, the Boys will do what they want. That's their right. If AJ marries Sarah and in a year's time he finds out that she was using him (which I'm NOT saying she is), then it's his mistake to make! A lot of you seem to think that ever since AJ got out of rehab, he's been more miserable, he looks awful, etc… all negative. Then we have the fans, like myself, who think he's looking a lot better and healthier. He's still fighting his demons and it's not going to take just seven months to get rid of them. It can take many, many years. If you're a fan shouldn't you be supportive?

Nick bought a powerboat cause his plan is to get himself killed. Yes, I've heard some fans say that. I just rolled my eyes. Nick is just a dumb blonde who doesn't know his ass from his head. Yes, I've read that, too. Frankly, I'm sick of reading these comments. All the other Boys are intelligent, but Nick's stupid. Why? Because he can't speak publicly without stammering? Listen carefully to the rest of them speak. No one is perfect. It's obvious that Nick is insecure when he has to answer somewhat personal questions or is being interviewed. Is that a crime? No. It doesn't make him stupid, either. I'd be willing to bet that he's a lot smarter than most of you think.

Those who are feeling disgusted by the Boys, leave! Just go away please. If you're so disgusted, why are you still a fan? Why are you still hanging around? Because you love to bitch and hear yourself talk? News Flash: The rest of us don't care.

Those of you who can't sleep at night because you're worrying about Kevin's marriage, perhaps you should worry about you own marriages instead. Let me tell you a little story. In 1999 I started talking to this 42-year old woman online. She's a fan of my writing and emailed me about my stories and we started emailing on/off. A few weeks ago, I was telling her about my disappointment with some of my fellow adult fans lately. She told me I could use her story as an example. Her name is Karen. She lives outside Chicago in Park Forest. She was married for 16 years and she has three kids. Karen became a BSB fan in 1997. She became an obsessive Kevin fan. She was always online, even going as far as to forget about making supper for her kids sometimes. She and her husband would get into some huge fights, but she continued to do her thing. When Kevin got married, she took it as a personal attack, I guess you could say, and fell apart. She decided that she had to talk some sense into Kevin and followed the Boys on the first leg of their B&B tour. Her husband told her not to go, but she didn't listen and now, two years later, she's divorced. She's struggling trying to raise her two daughters alone. Her son went to live with his dad. She regrets her stupidity and wants her family back. She can't believe that she let herself get so obsessed with Kevin's life that it ruined her marriage. She never got to meet Kevin or any of the guys and in hindsight, she's glad that she didn't. She's still a fan, but she limits it to the music and reading fan fiction. To all those fans that are letting the Boys rule their lives, she only has one message: Get a life!

I'm sure she's not the only one who's compromised her personal life because she was obsessed with one or all of the Boys. It's pretty sad, if you ask me. It might be a good time to seeking some of the therapy that some of you think BSB needs.

Some adult fans are so fond of putting "teenies" down. I'm not a teeny lover myself, but…. not every teenage fan is a teenybopper. I know a 17-year old fan that loves Nick, but has her own life and her own worries. I know a 15-year old fan that loves Brian to death, but supports Brian and Leighanne. I remember reading something when Kevin and Brian got married, about how they hoped their fans would continue to support them… that they were afraid to lose the younger fans. I think most of the younger fans are much more accepting of the marriages than the adult fans. You'd think it would be the other way around… but it isn't.

I'm not claiming that I'm perfect by any means and that I don't occasionally get annoyed or mad at something I read about BSB - because it has happened. But there's a difference between occasionally and constantly. Obviously, all this doesn't pertain to all adult fans. There are some really great adult fans out there and there are some really great teenage fans out there. Then there are the rest -- who try to ruin it for the rest of us fans, and we're tired of listening to them.

This is something that has been bothering me for a long time and I had to get it off my chest.

Marie-Alicia, May 15, 2002

Dear Maria,

I've been coming to your site for quite some time now and I really felt like I needed to write you.

But, most of all, I wanted to thank you. I'm a 17-year old girl from Holland and lately, I've started to realize I should 'let go' of the guys. For six years, they've been my life. Almost everything I did included them. I was always thinking of them, mostly about Nick, and listening to their music.

I never hated the girlfriends -- like we stand a chance with them. But I did anything I could to get to know everything about their personal lives.

The text you wrote about the so-called adult fans really got to me. Like you said, the guys have their OWN lives. It's not ours to control or to judge. Look at your own life first. I have my opinion about everything they do and I still do, but in a different way. You made me realize that and I want to thank you.

The stuff you write are about is real life and most of the fans, myself included, need to realize that. We should let the Boys live their own lives and let them be happy with whomever they want tp be with. In every picture you can see how happy Brian and Leighanne are together. That makes me thrilled. Finally Brian and Kevin (and now AJ) have found something stable in their lives -- something that's not ours. Too bad some fans often claim it to be ours.

Thank you for writing down the things you do. People like you made me realize a lot. Thank you!

Dear Maria,

I just finished reading your vents on cynical older fans and annoying fans and I wanted to tell you that I agree completely. There are some people out there who treat the Boys as objects rather than regular human beings and I think that's quite sad! Brian once said this: "My logic is that my life is no different than anyone else's except for four or five feet, and that four or five feet is how tall the stage is. Because if you put anyone else on stage, the girls will scream. I'm just the lucky one who's having an opportunity like this. When I step off the stage, I'm like anyone else."